Feeling proud and thankful
About four to five years back, one of my projects had some challenges and there wasn’t anything I could do about it.
At that point in time, it seemed almost impossible to overcome the challenges without asking for budget from the higher management and yet I wasn’t able to justify it.
Who would know that four to five years later, I would be able to write a small script to automate the alert that my Finance colleagues have been looking for.
So many things have changed in just a few years, including my knowledge and skills. And I am proud that I am now someone whom others are looking up to for answers in my area of expertise.
More importantly, I feel proud that I am able to share my experiences and knowledge with the community who needs them.
There is one person whom I really want to thank and he is none other than my ex manager. When he was still my manager, he shared with me regularly that times have changed, the world has changed and everything has changed and we need to change.
If we don’t pick up new skills, we will be left out. And he is one who always lead by example, always exploring new ideas, regardless whether it will lead to success or failure.
He inspired me to upgrade myself and so one day, I decided to pick up a new skill that might help in my work.
And so I did.
I bought an e-book on Python coding and started reading. I started to try out small programs to see if they worked according to what I wanted them to do.
Applying my new skill on my work and seeing that the programs I have written helped in the team in achieving some of our KPIs, I felt a great sense of achievement.
Thereafter, I used this new skill on a few more projects that eventually proved to be helpful to the team and the business.
Honestly speaking, the programs or scripts that I built were full of bugs without much fault catching and exception handling.
I used to do self comforting by reminding myself that I am not a full time programmer, not even an amateur.
And yesterday, I merely spent half a day and managed to re-use one of my existing scripts and came out with another automated script.
I am feeling great and proud and also I learned a new lesson.
What seems to be impossible then may not be always impossible. It is just the time wasn’t right or I have not put enough effort to think of alternative solution.
It’s the same to all my self learned skills like photography and sketching. I have never imagined myself to draw or sketch until I tried and practised.
Life’s events have triggered me to explore these unknown talent of mine.
Everyone has a talent within, may not be the greatest, but definitely can be discovered if the right person or right situation comes along.
Just like no matter how beautiful a flower is, if it does not meet the right person who appreciates its beauty, it is as good as an ugly thorn.
My ex manager definitely is one who can see the good of all his staffs and leverage on that to make us work as a team, instead of trying to optimise everyone’s productivity and be an armchair general.
Life is so unpredictable and ever changing that we do not know what we will be facing in the years to come, or we may even be on the edge of life and death tomorrow, feeling regretful over the things that we wanted to do but never did.
I never had regret so far.
There may be wishes that seem very far fetched, but with hope and letting go of expectations, life will happen for me, and not to me.
No matter what have happened to me in whole of my life, I always remind myself that nobody can ever tell me what would happen to me if I have taken the path that was not taken.
I am feeling proud today, extremely proud.
Am I the best in this world? Definitely not, but I’m definitely improving myself.
And I improve for myself and not for anyone else, for I I do not need to live my life base on the expectations of others.
That is truly loving myself.
And so I am grateful towards those who appreciate me as I am, my ex manager, my love and all my friends.