且骑且留影——这就是我 / Shoot as I ride — This is me

  手机iPhone XS被我粗鲁地摔得破了相,面貌惨不忍睹。    可这却也让我有了借口买一台新苹果手机——iPhone 12!    自从把数码相机收藏了起来之后,就一直用手机拍摄风景,然而总感觉与相机拍摄出来的效果实在是有天壤之别。    但是“息影”的我,已经不想再背负着重重的相机与配件到处奔赴,唯有将就着收接纳那些不是很好的照片。    上个星期天晚上,计划好了且骑且留影,想要试试看iPhone12的摄像功能。    就这样一个人停停走走,每到一处我认为还不错的地方,就让自己停下脚步,感受一下当时的那份宁静,然后再找最适合的角度,把那一幕捕捉在手机里。    結果竟然是出乎我的意料的好。    一个人独处,早已经习以为常。    静静地骑着,静静地拍摄,不必迁就任何人,也不必害怕别人的催促。     我的一生中也留下过许多照片,而我的人生就像照片里的景物一眼,从很多人,到这有两三个人,到今天我的每张照片,几乎除了我之外,就只有风景,再也没有其他人的出现。    曾看过那么一句话:我不害怕孤独,却害怕在人群中感到寂寞。    每每想到这句话,就会体会得更深一层。    确实,许多人都和我一样,发现年龄越长,真心朋友越少。    就算有,也只能偶尔打打招呼,毕竟彼此都有各自的生活。    以前的照片,翻开来看时,总会看到一些故事,挑起一些心事,也或许会燃起一些美丽的憧憬。    可如今的照片,看来看去也看不到空荡荡的风景里想说的或是想表达的是什么样的信息。    空虚感偶尔来袭。    除了骑自行车,拍摄以及画画之外,也喜欢自己一个人躲在一处敲击键盘,把心情的点滴敲成方块文字,借以抒发情绪。    有些人看我是一个孤僻的人,也有人把我看做是内向的人。    其实我也不知道我是一个什么样的人。    今天在脸书看到一张图片,很喜欢。    上面写着:不是每个人都可以遇见同样版本的我。有人或许会说我是一个好人,拥有美丽的灵魂。而另一个人或许会说我是一个无情、冷漠的坏人。请相信他们。因为我会跟着环境与对方作出适当的回应。    这就是我,那个独一无二的我。    18.06.2021    林顺源    My iPhone XS was disfigured greatly due to my careless handling.    But that gave me the excuse to get a new phone recently — iPhone 12!    Ever since I kept my mirrorless Fuji camera, I have been using my iPhone XS to shoot photos, but I was never satisfied with the output as I compared the quality with that of my […]

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A new plan?

I have wasted the whole day doing nothing yesterday. It was a wet Saturday as the rain started to pour from just before lunch till evening. And as I spent hours looking at YouTube videos on 8 brocades exercise (八段锦), it seemed like I was just watching and watching and watching, there’s no action taken until finally I decided to […]

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Cycling Alone……

It was a bright sunny Sunday morning. I looked out of the window and then looked at my new bike. For days, I’ve been planning on National Parks’ and Goole’s map to see where I could go in this small island to explore new cycling routes in this uneventful lifestyle of mine, instead of repeating the same old routines at […]

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内观

2021年3月28日。 晴中带阴。 没有风的白天,仿佛就像泡在温室里一般,感觉闷热。 母亲的失智症每况愈下,为了减轻自己的心理与身理上的压力,逐决定聘请佣人代为照顾母亲的起居生活。 于是今天忙了一整天整理屋子里的废物,腾出空间让家里的新成员有个睡觉的地方。 她的名字是Yesiani,来自印尼,在台湾当过数年的佣人,因此懂得以中文沟通。 不知道这是不是明智之举,但至少我作出了决定。 旁晚,弟弟一如既往地把母亲接到他的家里用餐,我则在用完晚饭后骑着自行车稍微运动一下,让自己的身与心都放空。 因冠状疫情,全球掀起了一股骑自行车的热潮,导致市场上的自行车有许多都缺货。 我算是例外,不是因为疫情,而是有一天看见自己的肚腩越来越大,衣裤渐渐显得紧绷,骤然察觉自己的缺乏运动。 本着作稍微轻松一点的运动的念头,买了一台自行车,开始了我的自得“骑”乐。 有一天, 忙里偷闲地骑着自行车探路,不经意发现沿着运河的步道竟有另一番风景。 放眼望去,那一片晴空万里的蓝天,完美无瑕,使河面也披上了一件蓝蓝的衣裳。当那偶尔的波光粼粼以及被夕阳染黄的建筑一一地投入我的眼帘,顿时感觉好不美丽。 在那一刻,在这里土生土长的我的心里,泛起一股莫名的感动,没想到新加坡也有这样的美景。 星期五那天,傍晚5时1刻下班,趁着父亲在家,而且天色还早,决定挑战自己的体力,用了两个小时骑了27公里,感觉无比的舒服。 沿途中仍然没有忘记把经过的美景摄入手机里,就像往昔一般与朋友们分享。 尤记得往年(除了去年),我都会出国旅行,就为了欣赏异国风情以及捕捉异地的良辰美景,何曾想过发掘新加坡那热情奔放的艳丽。 许多人和我一样,总是往外看,新加坡人到各地旅游,外国人却往这个热带小岛奔赴,完全忘了美景就在自个儿家门。 而我,也趁此提醒自己:幸福与快乐就在自己的心里,与外界的人、事、物完全无关…… 28.03.2021 林顺源

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Changing my outlook / 改变形象

It was a matter of a soft touch, and the message was sent across the wireless internet from a phone to another. Such communication through the wireless world has become a norm, which sometimes seem to make the world feels cold. While we try our best to inject feelings and emotions into the messages, either with lovely words or emoticons, […]

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Finished Art Piece

It didn’t take too long for me to finish my “art piece”. It isn’t perfect, but I absolutely love it. It is definitely one of my most satisfying art work. I am comforted. As I looked at the handsome guy on the paper, I smiled with admiration. Hmmm… this is one hell of a guy who can bring smiles upon […]

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Words are my only companion

23 March 2020. It is time for journaling again, and as I sat down in front of my iPad Pro and wonder what to write, the title “Words are my only companion” just came to my mind. Yes, indeed they are. For years, they have never deserted me, they have allowed me to express my thoughts, my feelings and my […]

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How to meditate…?

22 March 2020. Dad had a relapse of his mental illness. Tuesday night, he suddenly told me that he started to get worried and fearful for no reason. His mind couldn’t stop thinking and he feels miserable. I asked him what he was thinking about and what he was fearful of, he couldn’t articulate and the only thing he said […]

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